I have also had moments of hating private practice. The weeks without phone calls. The insecurity. The inconsistent income. The many new skills I had to learn.
As a Private Practice Proselytizer, I want people to know that they can have so much of what they want in life through private practice (assuming they want time, freedom, autonomy, and a great income). I try to keep it real about how it can be hard and scary but I frequently talk with folks who feel surprised by the fact that starting a private practice isn’t as joyful as they’d hoped.
There’s an underbelly to the transition to private practice. Sometimes the toxic agency work environment that you’ve been attributing all your unhappiness to didn’t actually earn all of it. Maybe clearing out the agency issues helped clarify that there are some other things you need to address in your life. Usually when we say things like “things you need to address in your life” we aren’t talking about fun things. Ultimately this is a good thing, right? We believe in looking at what needs to be looked at, not hiding, etc. But it’s hard. Especially with a new business and a new learning curve.
You are not solving your problems by going into private practice; you are choosing different problems. In order to not feel like a basket case, you need to have some solid emotion regulation skills, a strong support system, and a plan.
I traded in being overworked and underpaid, not being able to take PTO I’d earned, and walking on eggshells for having to learn things that didn’t always come naturally to me (feeling stupid), having to address tech issues (immense frustration), getting my own clients (high anxiety), finding ways to stay on top of DSM or ICD changes (feeling lost). I chose these problems, which doesn’t mean I don’t get to complain about them. (Let’s complain if it’s actually helpful.) I chose these problems half-unaware of what I was getting myself into.
Do I regret going into private practice? Not for a second. Not for a fraction of a second. Do I love the problems I chose? Hell no. You don’t have to love them. Over time they just have to feel better than the problems you had before.
There’s this Tim S. Grover quote I remind myself of when I feel less motivated to get a task done that needs doing: “You don’t have to love it. You just have to believe it’s worth it in the end.” If it doesn’t feel worth it, it’s a good indicator that it’s not what I need to focus my time & energy on. If it does, I knock it out like I did half the assignments in grad school that felt more like a means to an end than a passion project.
What problems are did trade in and which did you sign up for as you chose private practice over agency work? Let us know in the comments.
Great post, Allison. Truth is, wherever we go, there we are. For me, that means I have to deal with anxiety no matter where I am earning my income.
I Benefitted from this article greatly. Thank you So much.
Still at my agency and getting some clients on the side. I have 1 right now:-). It’s maddening, all of it. The anxiety, the doubts, the excitement, the hoping. Oh, the day I’ll look back at this from my swing on the front porch sipping coffee and smile…
Brilliant post and absolutely my experience! I traded in moral distress and unethical practices for IsOlation and having a floodlight shone on my money story! I wouldn’t go back fOr all the tea in china!
Oh allison! Timing is PerFect. I didnt leave a horrible agency. I have been in practice for a year, full load and some i amreferring for lack of space.. but, i am having some weird feelings, cannot pin point them. PerHaps im lonely, feeling too isolated, overwhelmed? I love this gIg.. i think? Great post!
excellent! thank you so much. All of it is right on. i love the quote. i’m going to share it with my children.
thank you for this post. I love that you keep it real. i will be launching soon and i am excited about the possibilities. my husband is self employed so i’ve seen the good and the bad of being your own boss. when i do get anxious i think about the limitations i had in jobs passed and i get excited and hopeful once again! it’s so nice to know i am not alone. thank you for creating this community for us.
I’m trading in the responsibility for monitoring and correcting other people’s work and the frustration of working in an agency that’s unwilling to improve systems, benefits, etc. for staff. I’m eagerly awaiting my launch into full time private practice in October where i can do things how i’d prefer to! I’ve already got a caseload of 13-15 a week so I’m off to a great start! Thanks for your inspiration and support, Miss Allison!
hmmm Im still employed with my primary agency and working my PP one and a half days per week. I am tired because of the hours; for months i only had one EAP client but by the 4th month i grew to 7 EAP clients and then through some net working i obtained 4 new referrals. Having EAP clients gave me the needed slowness to pace myself, At this point, getting paneled for insurance companies, getting forms in place determining fee schedules, obtaining referral sources and locating my own office space after an incident with a friend/colleague i am sharing a space with are my stressors. I consider this to be good stress because i am dong something for me. Yes i am concerned about my success and whether pp will yield me the income i’m making now plus over head but that’s what my next year and half will be all about…preparation for full time practice.