So, I hate New Year’s Resolutions. They feel forced. If you want to change something, you should start now instead of waiting for some magical date. (Ok, do you hear that? That’s the hustler in me. I’m fighting her like crazy.)
One of the things I recognized about myself in 2015 is that I have a hustling problem. Too much of my identity is rooted in achievement. It always has been. All the podcasts and books and business instagram accounts and everything talk about “living like no one will so you can live like no one can.” Fuck that (pardon my french). They make you believe that the only way to succeed is to bleed yourself dry. To forsake your well being, friends and family and “rise and grind.” Don’t believe it. Don’t buy in.
Logically I’ve KNOWN this for all of 2015, but it wasn’t until the latter part of the year that I realized I needed to step away from the laptop, turn off my phone, get really present. Look into my husband’s eyes while he’s talking. Stop thinking about work tasks while singing and dancing with my daughter. I get caught up in THERE’S SO MUCH TO DO, which isn’t even true. Nobody dies if I don’t post a blog one week. If I’m sick & have to reschedule some folks, my family won’t starve.
So I’ve dubbed 2016 the Year of Not Hustling. Hopefully with an aim to create many many more of these years. And hopefully it won’t be so damn hard to follow through with after a year of practice.
In honor of not hustling, all our January Abundance posts are a reminder to take good care of yourself. You may have a resolution/intention/goal to exercise more or to build your dream practice or to meet an amazing partner and that’s awesome. Just please, please, please remember that staying up until 3 AM isn’t necessary for any of that and, with the exception of maybe spending some quality time with said amazing parter, maybe even detrimental. Pushing yourself when your body or mind are clearly telling you to sit and be is going to slow your progress with everything. Trust your body, trust your mind, trust yourself.
There’s honor to slow and steady. While it’s not my usual route, I’m clear that forcing things and pushing myself all the time isn’t congruent with living the life I want to live nor is it consistent with my hopes for you.
Repeat after me: There’s room for self-care as you build your practice. Self-care is NECESSARY in order to build your practice. If you are run ragged and working too much, your caseload will decrease instead of increase and colleagues will be less inclined to refer to you.
Whatever your 2016 goals/intentions/resolutions, please be good to yourself. Please be gentle and kind. Take the time to connect to the people in your lives, not just clients. Have some long kisses and some playtime and some quiet reflection. Y’know, be present.
Grow your practice like your clients are watching.
How can you bring more self-care into your life this year? Let us know in the comments.
Allison Puryear is an LCSW with a nearly diagnosable obsession with business development. She has started practices in three different states and wants you to know that building a private practice is shockingly doable when you have a plan and support. After retiring her individual consultation services, she opened the Abundance Party, where you can get practice-building help for the cost of a copay. You can download a free private practice checklist to make sure you have your ducks in a row, get weekly private practice tips, listen to the podcast, hop into the free Facebook Group. Allison is all about helping you gain the confidence and tools you need to succeed.